When I was younger, especially a teenager, I used to worry, and lay awake at night worrying about everything, real and imagined. Then as I got older, every so often I'd have a big worry and then let it go. Nowadays of course I worry, but not a lot and not so it keeps me awake at night. I do not have a monkey mind and find meditation easy to slip into.
But last night, I had a monkey mind about an issue in our lives right now, that I want to do a Pontius Pilate with, and wash my hands of.
Readers old, and some new, may know about the business my chap and I " caretake ". We were set to buy it, but after the owner's refusal to fix some certain elements of the business, to the tune of over $20,000, we decided not to buy it, but have in the meantime continued as caretakers, despite both working at our other jobs.
The owners refuse to answer any e-mails and things are beginning to break down and need fixing, which as the caretaker's we are not financially responsible for.
The owner's have basically washed their hands of it....and we are looking like we don't care about the business as it is falling into disrepair. The people who frequent it, think we own it, and we get the flack and feedback.
Personally I am so over it and I know my dear boy is too.
So anyway, I was in bed at 2pm monkey-minding the damn thing, I sleep well at night, sleep comes very easily to me...and I object to losing sleep over this bloody business.
I must be selfish and materialistic however as I keep thinking of the money we'd be giving up, but I think it has come to the point that I don't care. We want our lives back, and as the owner's don't care, I am wondering why I am losing so much sleep over it.
More later, I need a wash !
On a positive note however, my dear boy is going to fly me somewhere to see RUFUS WAINWRIGHT...turns out that he ( my boy ) not surprisingly knows the right people, don't know why that shocked me :)
